I didn’t know there was a danger. Not a clue. One day we’re a normal household of dominant married couple with a docile hound, the next everything flipped. I blame Star Wars.
The first sign was pretty clear. My husband and I left the dog, locked in the kitchen using a baby gate, for a couple hours. We’re good dog parents. She had water, food, toys, chewies and a comfy bed. When we returned, our home had sustained some damage… But before we could scold our wayward canine, a message overcame all thoughts in our minds. “This is not the Bloodhound you seek. She did not chew through the baby gate, get trapped in the living room and pee on the carpet. It was another dog.”
Obviously, our dog is a Jedi Master with incredible powers. Another example of her control, on our daily walks I know the names of all the neighborhood dogs (Andy, Lucky, Logan, Blue, Riley, Spot and Dusty), but I rarely remember their owners. Humans just don’t seem important anymore.
Then there’s the feeding schedule. My husband and I are slaves to it. There’s breakfast, lunch and dinner with snacks between walks, pees… and sometimes for no reason at all. Occasionally there’s the double feed. After I feed her, she will often use the Dog Force on my poor husband. “There wasn’t any kibble in this bowl. You will fill the bowl now. You live to fill the bowl. Burp!” Obi-Wan Kenobi had no idea what he was unleashing on us!
So, does your dog have similar powers? I’d love to hear from you. If I don’t reply to your responses right away, it’s because I have an overwhelming urge to feed the dog a third lunch and rub her belly for an hour.
Jamie Brazil is a contemporary fiction author. Her comedic romance novel, Prince Charming, Inc., is a Night Owl Romance “Top Pick.”